


Trowa Goes to the Convenience Store

by SapphiraBlue



Category: Gundam Wing
Genre: Clowns, Contortionism, Gen, Inspired By Tumblr, Timeline What Timeline, Vignette
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-23
Updated: 2020-06-23
Packaged: 2021-03-03 22:48:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24883348
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SapphiraBlue/pseuds/SapphiraBlue
Summary: Trowa Barton is a clown (literally).Inspired bythis tumblr post.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 16





	Trowa Goes to the Convenience Store

“Duo! Duo, I need you to listen to this story and then tell Trowa he’s an idiot.”

Duo gently shut his laptop with a quiet _snap_ , steepled his hands under his nose, and turned to face Quatre with his most attentive expression plastered on his face. Trowa was behind him, leaned up against the doorjamb, the tiniest goddamn smirk visible on his almost perpetually blank face.

“Do tell, Quatre, I’m all ears,” said Duo.

“ _Apparently-_ ” Quatre started, and Duo leaned forward, because a story starting with an emphasized _apparently_ was sure to be entertaining – “ _apparently,_ that one time when we were all undercover, y’know, Trowa threw out his back!”

“OK, so? He’s a clown, that’s pretty normal, right?” Duo looked at Trowa, who nodded.

“I practiced one of my new routines too hard,” he said, as if it was obvious.

“ _So_ , he got hungry, but he couldn't _stand up to get food_ , so he-” here Trowa interrupted, with, “Well of course I couldn’t stand and walk, my back hurt!”

Quatre shushed him with a flap of a hand over his shoulder, not even looking behind him to see where Trowa actually was.

“I can’t really describe this bit, so please show Duo what you decided to do,” he instructed. Trowa immediately bent backwards into a full backbend, shuffling around on his hands and feet until he was once again facing Duo and Quatre, looking like something that crawled directly out of a horror movie. Duo shuddered, because Trowa kept his deadpan expression, just staring at the both of them like this was a _normal thing human beings did every day_.

Quatre pointed. “See, he did that whole thing, because his spine is made of jelly, or something. And he _went outside like that._ ”

“I don’t envy whatever convenience store clerk was working that night, honestly, that’s just eerie,” Duo agreed.

“Oh, it gets worse. Remember, he can’t stand, right? So how can he pay for his food if the counter’s at standing height?”

“Oh shit, the plot thickens,” Duo said, delighted. Trowa was still shuffling around like a creepy crab thing, until he found the edge of the table and _climbed up it._ Duo burst out laughing.

“You must’ve scared the shit out of the poor clerk!” Trowa nodded in that barely perceptible way of his.

“He told me the register broke,” he commented, still deadpan, still perched on the coffee table like a malevolent spirit. “I offered cash, but he told me it was fine, that I could just take my stuff. So I did.”

“Not only that!” Quatre interjected. “He got a text from whatever law enforcement agency in the area, about a _suspicious person seen at the convenience store_.”

Trowa shifted on the table until he was sitting up properly, rolling out a shoulder with a crunch. “I didn’t realize until I was telling Quatre the story that they meant me. I thought it was someone else.”

Duo laughed so hard he fell off his chair when Quatre exclaimed, “That was _years ago_ , Trowa, how could you not realize-”

“Look, I didn’t think there wasn’t anything particularly suspicious about-” Trowa retorted, and the argument went on over Duo’s head for a while as he tried to catch his breath.

“Trowa! Trowa, listen, you’re a smart guy, love ya to pieces,” Duo said, “-but that is _absolutely_ the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard you doing.”

Quatre made a sound of vindication, which made Trowa smile.

“I’m a professional clown, Duo, everything I do is stupid and unsettling,” he retorted.

“Still!”

**Author's Note:**

> :3c


End file.
